I came up with an excellent porn star name for The Boy (should he want one): Girth Vader.
When I told The Boy this brilliant idea, he didn't fall over laughing or start eagerly planning his new career path (the two reactions I'd anticipated). I'm not sure why not: as a porn star name, "Girth Vader" is an amusing bit of wordplay that implies both nerdiness and well-endowed-ness. Surely some reaction other than "Uh-huh" would have been in order. Sometimes I don't think The Boy is fully attuned to my sophistimacated sense of humour.
But all is not lost: I think I might do a painting of this fictitious Girth Vader. Picture a head-and-torso portrait of a buff naked guy in a Darth Vader mask with a really thick pink light-saber beam extending from the bottom of the frame where his crotch would be. Maybe I'll do porn-star parodies of a bunch of different Star Wars characters! Porn Troopers, Grabba the Butt, Princess Lay Ya...
...Or maybe not.