Caturday: and Now For Something Completely Different

So as I've mentioned, with The Boy and I both home on a full-time basis, I never know what the hell day it is anymore.  I spent all of Saturday happily painting, and then just after midnight I realized it was Caturday and I was like

:O 

...but then I realized that the painting I finished today is tenuously cat-related and I was like 

:D.

And that's why this week's slightly late Caturday post is a 6"x12" painting of a hot Asian boy wearing kitty ears.

True story.

_____

Valentine's Day is coming up!  If you need a gift for your sweetie, might I humbly suggest this Flying Heart necklace from my Zazzle store?  It's sterling plated and the picture is gorgeously vibrant and when you hand it to your special someone, you can say "I'm giving this to you 'cause this is how my heart feels when I'm with you."  And then you'll probably get laid a whole lot because that is a killer line. 

You give my heart wings by SheSaidPop
(It comes in a round version, too, if that's what turns your crank.)

In Praise of Skinny Men

Y'know the lower back "dimples" a lot of people have?  I have recently realized that they are actually the spot where a person's ass-muscles meet their back muscles.  Each ass-cheek is roughly teardrop-shaped, and the muscles around the lower spine are kinda V-shaped, so they dovetail - with a little dent in-between.

I didn't learn this from an anatomy textbook, by the way.  I learned it by ogling The Boy, who is so slender that I can clearly see every single muscle (and most of the tendons, and many of the bones) on his body.  I've learned more about how the human body is built from watching him walk around naked than I ever did from the anatomical diagrams in art class.  He is truly an artist's dream come true.

But also?  He's my dream come true.  I've been attracted to greyhound-skinny dudes for as long as I can remember, and The Boy is a perfect example of my ideal physical "type".  You guys, when I wrap my hand around his ankle my finger and thumb touch.  MRRRRRROWWWWR.

Anyhoo.  For quite some time now I've been planning to paint a series of "pin-up boys" - that is, men striking typically female poses (and sometimes wearing typically female clothes, too).  These men will of course be skinny and slightly effeminate, because if I'm gonna spend ten hours painting something I want it to be fun for me.  The "pin-up boy" concept is my way of playing around with gender roles and hopefully inspiring some discussion.  It's also my way of of addressing the distinct lack of hot, objectifying images of guys in pop culture*.

I finished the first painting in the series yesterday.  Naturally, The Boy was my model.  Ever wondered what he looks like (naked)?  Here you go:

Normally he's not so red, though.  Or horny.

I should be painting more pin-up boys really soon.  And, once I figure out the best way to photograph these paintings (this one is 8"x10"), I'll put them up for sale in the "Androgyny and Kink" section of my Artfire store...and post here to let you know they're up!

So, if you dig pictures of skinny, twinky, androgynous boys striking submissive poses for your pleasure...keep an eye on this space. :D

*Read: "I can't find porn that suits my needs so I'm gonna make my own."

Manliness is itchier than I had anticipated.

Today The Boy shaved using an electric razor and left a big pile of "hair dust" in the sink.  When I saw this, I did what any perfectly normal and well-adjusted 38-year-old woman would do: I smeared it on my face and neck to see how I'd look with badass Don Johnson stubble.

Answer: SMOKIN' HAWT.

Conversational Snippet #10: Retro Edition!: Why My Mom is Awesome

[My mom and I are out for brunch; at this point, The Boy and I have been dating for a couple of months and it's going really well, so I mention that I'm seeing someone.  And then I decide to go for the Big Confession:]

Me: ...and, by the way...The Boy is an occasional crossdresser.  I've always liked feminine men, so the crossdressing is a happy thing for me - something I actively wanted and looked for.

Mom: Oh.  [Pause.]  Can you explain something to me?

Me:  Sure...

Mom: Why would anyone want to wear women's clothes if they didn't have to?  They're constricting, they're itchy, they're uncomfortable...

Me: I know, right?  But he's willing to put up with it for the sake of being pretty.  And, hey, better him than me!

So obviously the Big Confession went smoothly.  Frankly, I wasn't that worried anyway: my mom is open-minded* and would be fine with any partner I had as long as he/she/zie treated me well.  But it still felt good to get things out in the open.

By the way, after brunch we hung out at my place for a bit.  My mom spotted a pair of platform Mary Janes tossed in a corner and said, surprised*, "You have girl shoes!" - then she immediately corrected herself: "Wait...they're his, aren't they?"  

And they were.

*And yet, somehow, she manages to be very sheltered at the same time.  She probably hasn't heard of many kinks or alternate lifestyles but if someone explained one to her she'd just go "Well, as long as it's not hurting anyone..."

**It's true that I don't own too many girlie-type shoes...but I didn't think clunky dude-shoes were, like, my trademark or anything.  Considering how shocked my mom was for those two microseconds, though, I guess I come off more butch than I'd realized.  Not that there's anything wrong with that!

Conversational Snippet #8: Nobody Likes an Uppity Camwhore

[I am still obsessing on paintings of food, but now another obsession has appeared - hot mermen.  So naturally I got The Boy to pose for a bunch of reference photos, because he is pretty and readily available and loves having his picture taken.  Later, this happened:]

Me: Y'know what's a shame about this merman thing?  I don't get to draw your spectacular ass.  It'll just be, like, a featureless curve at the top of your tail.

Boy: So just move it up.  [Gestures at his chest and does a little shimmy.]

Me: But I'm painting you as a merman, not a mermaid.

Boy: So?

Me: I am not giving you mermoobs.

Caturday: I Know What I Like.

I love distinctive-looking animals, and what initially drew me to Birch was his awesome faceblob and his blue eyes.  When the volunteer at his foster home told me he's a calico and that something like 99% of calico cats are female, all that registered was "oooh, he's handsome and rare as well!"

It wasn't until I brought Birch home that I realized he's basically a crossdresser - you know, a boy body with an outer layer of "girl".  Apparently I'm such a drag hag that I chose an androgynous pet without even realizing it.  And less than a year later, The Boy moved in, doubling the number of catty little transvestites I live with.

"...But I'm the pretty one."

Gender Wednesday: Poses.

I'm toying with the idea of doing regular "features" on my blog, so let's try this: on Wednesdays I'll make a post about crossdressing or gender.  Starting.............NOW!

The Boy, as I may have mentioned, enjoys presenting as female sometimes.  He likes to feel sexy and pretty, and regular boy-clothes don't really allow for that the same way fishnets and pleather do.

As for me, I've experimented with dressing as a boy once or twice - mostly out of curiosity and an urge to mess with people ("if I go out in public like this, will I pass?"), and partly to ramp up the contrast when The Boy is being The Girl.

The problem, though, is the photographs.

My hard drive has approximately fifty gazillion photographs of The Boy vamping it up in girl clothes.  He strikes all the archetypal "sexy woman"-type poses: crawling sexily across the floor, looking coquettishly over his shoulder, lying on his back with his legs in the air, and many, many more.

Also on my hard drive: approximately five photographs of me as a dude.  In them, I am striking all the archetypal "dude" poses: grabbing my crotch, giving the finger to the camera, and standing there with my arms hanging like salamis...and that's basically it.  I'd get The Boy to take more photos of dude-me, but they would all look just like those first five except with a different shirt.

Maybe the shortage of viable boy-poses is why drag kings seem so much rarer than drag queens: it's hard to be campy as a boy.  If you try to do a satire of manliness, you just end up leering and grabbing your wadded-up pants-sock every single time.  Meh.

You KNOW I had to do one in pink...

Painting these pictures of The Boy's gorgeous mouth was really satisfying.  After spending all that time carefully analyzing the shapes, colours, and proportions of his lips and teeth and tongue, I feel like I know them in a way I didn't before.  Probably a med student feels this way about a body he's dissected; probably a mechanic feels this way about a car engine he's assembled from parts.

A lot of the drawings and paintings I did when I was a teenager were portraits of famous people that I had crushes on (guys from '80s synthpop bands...*blush*).  I realize now that it's because the process of putting their image on paper or canvas felt intimate to me...running my pencil or paintbrush over the contours of their faces was the next best thing to touching them in person.

(This 4”x4” painting is for sale on Etsy!  Click the picture to go to the listing.)

More lips.

More of The Boy’s luscious lips.  He’s wearing Cyber lipstick by MAC, by the way.

I wear makeup so rarely that it tends to go bad before I can use it up; I’m glad to have someone to share it with so it doesn’t go to waste.  And The Boy happily returns the favour, so I now have access to all kinds of fantastic cosmetics I didn’t have to buy.  Symbiosis!

(This 4”x4” painting is for sale on Etsy!  Click the picture to go to the listing.)

Obsession

As an artist, I go through periods where I’m obsessed with a certain subject or image and I paint it over and over again. A few weeks ago, my obsession was The Boy's mouth.

People tend to assume, at first, that these lips belong to a woman. I find this fascinating: if makeup and an overtly sexy expression are all it takes for a male to be read as female, the line between the sexes must be a lot thinner than we’re taught to believe. I’m okay with that. :)

(This 4”x4” painting is for sale on Etsy!  Click the picture to go to the listing.)