Sunday, June 12, 2011
Caturday: an Open Letter to Birch
You are a loved and valued family member and I respect your autonomy.
When I am walking from one part of the apartment to another, please GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY WAY. I've got shit to do and you do not; when our paths intersect, it's because I am trying to get to a specific place to complete a particular task and you are wandering around aimlessly between naps. Therefore, my ambulatory needs take precedence and shall continue to do so until you either start pitching in on rent or can prove that you're late for an appointment.
No, seriously, get the fuck out of my way. Don't you dare start rolling around on the floor in front of my feet, Birchy. Don't do it...don't do it...AW GODDAMMIT.