So the other day a smallish orange escaped my grocery bag and rolled onto the floor. Birch started playfully batting it around, which was totally adorable. It also kind of surprised me because an orange is, like, a hundred times heavier than one of his hollow plastic jingle-ball toys. He rolled it across the floor without any apparent effort, though.
I started wondering: does Birch need a heavier workout than he's been getting? Is this business with the orange a cry for help?
The Boy and I think we should put him on a hardcore weight training program as follows:
Step 1: Buy Birch a new and incrementally heavier piece of produce to toss around every week.
Step 2: Watch his upper body slowly but surely become a rippling wall of muscle. Do cats have biceps? THEY DO NOW.
Step 3: ???
Step 4: PROFIT!
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| Move over, Gallagher: in six weeks there'll be a new watermelon-smasher in town! |
On second thought, I probably don't want to give my whiny, demanding, attention-whore kitty the ability to hurl 25lb pumpkins at my head...so maybe I'll just leave well enough alone.
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